今天我有一个朋友跟我说，如果我再当你的舔狗那么他就要打断我的腿，我心想还好是腿，如果打断我的手的话我现在怎么给你发消息啊？
Today, one of my friends told me that if I continue to be your licking dog, he will break my leg. I thought to myself, it's a leg, but if I break my hand, how can I send you a message now?
昨天叫了一辆出租车，本来十分钟的路程，他足足给我绕了二十分钟，等我发觉的时候，我眼睛一红，我想也许他是这个世界上唯一一个想和我多待一会儿的那个人吧！
Yesterday called a taxi, originally ten minutes of the journey, he fully gave me around twenty minutes, when I found, my eyes a red, I think maybe he is the only one in the world and I want to stay for a while that person!
突发奇想，突然好想变成一个手持电风扇，你喜欢我的时候就可以把我捧在手上，难道你不喜欢我的时候，我就把你吹到天上。
Whim, suddenly really want to become a hand-held electric fan, you like me when you can hold me in the hands, don't you like me when I blow you to the sky.
春天来了，最近天气变得越来越热，小草也慢慢的长出来了，我感觉头有点痒，我想大概这就是再长脑子吧！
Spring is coming, the weather is getting hotter and hotter recently, the grass is slowly growing out, I feel a little itchy head, I think this is probably to grow the brain again!
我也不知道，你每次吃全家桶的时候有没有愧疚感？你有没有想过那是鸡的全家呀？我就知道你没有想过，因为像你这样的人就只会在乎你自己。
I don't know, do you feel guilty every time you eat the whole family bucket? Did you ever think that was the chicken's family? I knew you didn't, because people like you only care about yourself.
有一件事情至今我都觉得很奇怪，为什么每次当我准备认真学习的时候，我身边的一切就好像变得非常有趣，书也好好玩，笔也好好玩，还有任何的风吹草动都能够吸引我的注意力。
There is one thing that I still feel very strange, why every time when I am ready to study seriously, everything around me seems to become very interesting, the book is fun, the pen is fun, and any wind or grass can attract my attention.
现在经常有粉丝为了自己的爱豆在网上乱糟糟的吵成一团，其实我很奇怪，他们到底为什么要吵架呢？难道就不能大家约好心平气和地坐下来，扇对方几个耳耳光吗？
Now there are often fans for their love beans on the Internet messy quarrel into a group, in fact, I am very strange, why do they want to fight? Couldn't we all agree to sit down and slap each other in the ear?
四月已经开始了，五月马上就到了，那么520那一天还会远吗？别着急，我想在520的那一天总会有一个男孩子手捧鲜花走到你面前，然后微笑着对你说：“不好意思，请让一下”。
April has begun, and May is just around the corner, so can 520 be far behind? Don't worry, I think in 520 that day there will always be a boy hand holding flowers walk to you in front, and then smile to you say:"embarrassed, please let".
上大学的第一天，我就遇到了一个帅哥，于是我就鼓起勇气跑过去问他：同学，我是艺术系的，请问你是哪个系的呀？只见那帅哥对我邪魅一笑说着：管好你自己，跟你没关系！
The first day of the university, I met a handsome boy, so I summon up the courage to run over to ask him: classmate, I am an art department, which department are you, please? See that handsome boy to my evil spirit a smile to say: manage yourself, have nothing to do with you!
结语：一些沙雕又脱俗的文案句子，搞怪有趣，用来调节气氛很赞！
Conclusion: some sand sculpture and free from vulgarity of the text sentence, funny, used to adjust the atmosphere is very good!
